Comments on: What should I say to him to save our relationship? http://hurricanequestions.com/what-should-i-say-to-him-to-save-our-relationship.htm Thu, 24 May 2012 09:53:56 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.7.1 hourly 1 By: SyntheticSmile http://hurricanequestions.com/what-should-i-say-to-him-to-save-our-relationship.htm/comment-page-1#comment-8386 SyntheticSmile Fri, 12 Feb 2010 14:35:32 +0000 http://hurricanequestions.com/what-should-i-say-to-him-to-save-our-relationship.htm#comment-8386 Hmmm... it sounds like he is largely at fault here, but I also understand his position (being that he isn't used to kids and this is the first time he's lived away from home). Have you tried couples counseling? You should flat out tell him that it isn't "his" house if you are both living there - despite who the hell pays the bills - and saying other wise is not only hurtful, but detrimental to your relationship. That's not fair for him to pull that on you. Neither is it fair for him to get mad when your 2 yr old makes a mess - especially when you are the one cleaning it up. Honestly, sounds like he's being pretty immature about the whole thing. Is there an extra room in the house that you can set up as his little area? Somewhere you can keep both the kids and the cats out of, so he can have his quiet time? Also, it sounds like maybe you guys need to learn to pick your battles a bit better if you're fighting over petty little things all the time. Like if he's complaining about trivial little things all the time - just let him vent. Don't argue with him about it. I suggest sitting down with him and having a really good, long heart to heart with him. Make a set of house rules you can both agree too (such as, no one comes over without consulting your partner first. etc). Idk. Tough situation, but definately something you guys can work through. Hope I helped. Hmmm… it sounds like he is largely at fault here, but I also understand his position (being that he isn’t used to kids and this is the first time he’s lived away from home). Have you tried couples counseling? You should flat out tell him that it isn’t "his" house if you are both living there - despite who the hell pays the bills - and saying other wise is not only hurtful, but detrimental to your relationship. That’s not fair for him to pull that on you. Neither is it fair for him to get mad when your 2 yr old makes a mess - especially when you are the one cleaning it up. Honestly, sounds like he’s being pretty immature about the whole thing. Is there an extra room in the house that you can set up as his little area? Somewhere you can keep both the kids and the cats out of, so he can have his quiet time? Also, it sounds like maybe you guys need to learn to pick your battles a bit better if you’re fighting over petty little things all the time. Like if he’s complaining about trivial little things all the time - just let him vent. Don’t argue with him about it. I suggest sitting down with him and having a really good, long heart to heart with him. Make a set of house rules you can both agree too (such as, no one comes over without consulting your partner first. etc). Idk. Tough situation, but definately something you guys can work through. Hope I helped.

]]> By: Crystal LeeAnn http://hurricanequestions.com/what-should-i-say-to-him-to-save-our-relationship.htm/comment-page-1#comment-8387 Crystal LeeAnn Fri, 12 Feb 2010 14:35:32 +0000 http://hurricanequestions.com/what-should-i-say-to-him-to-save-our-relationship.htm#comment-8387 Sounds like he was not ready for the relationship to go to the next level. He was a bachelor for a long time and had his independence. Those are his things and not both of yours. He is feeling a lot of stress for someone being in his home. He was just not ready. What should have happened is the both of you gotten a place together. He feels he has lost control over his life and he is not pleased. Move out and take another look at the relationship. Maybe it is best for you to remain friends. Sounds like he was not ready for the relationship to go to the next level. He was a bachelor for a long time and had his independence. Those are his things and not both of yours. He is feeling a lot of stress for someone being in his home. He was just not ready. What should have happened is the both of you gotten a place together. He feels he has lost control over his life and he is not pleased.

Move out and take another look at the relationship. Maybe it is best for you to remain friends.

]]> By: misty http://hurricanequestions.com/what-should-i-say-to-him-to-save-our-relationship.htm/comment-page-1#comment-8388 misty Fri, 12 Feb 2010 14:35:32 +0000 http://hurricanequestions.com/what-should-i-say-to-him-to-save-our-relationship.htm#comment-8388 I did not have to finish all of the question to know what to say, or what answer to give you. Even though you shared so many things from the past, and families and friends of friends, that is the past the future is now, and if he is acting this way NOW, then dump him. Forget the past, yes, I know, they are hard to forget, I do not ever think I will come to grips with mine, but that is a whole nother banana!!!! :-) Really, if he is shouting, not being nice, calling the kids stupid names, then really, who needs him?? You do not, and neither do your children. He is not worth it. Regardless of what you shared in the past. I did not have to finish all of the question to know what to say, or what answer to give you.

Even though you shared so many things from the past, and families and friends of friends, that is the past the future is now, and if he is acting this way NOW, then dump him.

Forget the past, yes, I know, they are hard to forget, I do not ever think I will come to grips with mine, but that is a whole nother banana!!!! :-)

Really, if he is shouting, not being nice, calling the kids stupid names, then really, who needs him?? You do not, and neither do your children.

He is not worth it.

Regardless of what you shared in the past.

]]> By: db http://hurricanequestions.com/what-should-i-say-to-him-to-save-our-relationship.htm/comment-page-1#comment-8389 db Fri, 12 Feb 2010 14:35:32 +0000 http://hurricanequestions.com/what-should-i-say-to-him-to-save-our-relationship.htm#comment-8389 wow! you didnt know he was this way b4? Moving in together will push the limites of compromise. At least you didnt get married yet. Sounds like a controling person. However house guest that dont respect my property are not invited back. Really easy to be a good house guest instead of a bad one wow! you didnt know he was this way b4? Moving in together will push the limites of compromise. At least you didnt get married yet. Sounds like a controling person. However house guest that dont respect my property are not invited back. Really easy to be a good house guest instead of a bad one

]]> By: kimberlycoolerson http://hurricanequestions.com/what-should-i-say-to-him-to-save-our-relationship.htm/comment-page-1#comment-8390 kimberlycoolerson Fri, 12 Feb 2010 14:35:32 +0000 http://hurricanequestions.com/what-should-i-say-to-him-to-save-our-relationship.htm#comment-8390 He sounds borderline abusive. Get out now. He sounds borderline abusive. Get out now.

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